Splittings 11/19/2019

If I could learn to learn from the pain…

I would learn the balance between honoring the past and looking forward to the future. I would learn that I don’t have to feel guilty for being here and hoping to be happy again. I would learn that being happy now is not betraying his memory. I would learn that life goes on but not the way it did before. I would learn that grief never ends, we just learn to move forward with it. I would learn that sometimes life just isn’t fair but we have to accept it anyway.

If I could learn to learn from the pain…

I would learn that nothing is forever and change is the only constant. I would learn that we don’t control anything in life except for the way we respond to the things that happen to us. I would learn that the little things aren’t little things. I would learn to pay attention to the details of the people closest to me. I would take more pictures and put my phone down more. I would go on more “friend dates” and say “I love you” more. I would hug longer and kiss the faces of my friends and laugh with them every chance I got.

If I could learn to learn from the pain…

I would love myself more. I would forgive myself when I’m not perfect. I would love my body and appreciate the abilities it has. I would take more walks outside in the fresh air. I would drink more water and eat more vegetables. I would care less about what others think and more about how I feel. I would say “no” more. I would say yes to more adventures. I would dance in the rain more and make more snow angels and sing at the top of my lungs and not care whether Im good at it or not. I would tell myself “I love you” more and mean it. I would no longer sit at a table when love is not being served. I would make myself a priority.

If I could learn to learn from the pain…

I would help anywhere I could. I would give more love more freely and without strings attached. I would feed more hungry mouths and soothe more broken hearts and spend time with more lonely people. I would use my time to be the change I want to see in the world. I would give my heart to causes bigger than myself. I would open my home and my heart to the people around me. I would as for help when I need it and let other people love me, too. I would build a tribe and love them hard and make sure that my life was an example of unconditional love. I would feel the pain and let it make me a better person.

If I could learn to learn from the pain…

I would find a way to turn it into love and let it go.

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